Life is jus about to start anew for me. Uni is starting in Sept and i'm already almost fully recovered, mentally and physically. It has been almost a year since i joined my new agency. I've gained some very valuable experience n some major additions to my portfolio. My family has been more stable.. Dear is also picking up financially. The future seems bright and well. I jus cross my fingers nothing happens to shatter this beautiful picture again...

Counting to date, I've been resting for half a year already. Of which, i spent most of the time searching for the real purpose of my existence. Depression was like a downward spiral. One moment i found myself slipping down, the next i cant seem to pick myself up again. I never thought i'd let myself go down like i didn't have a choice. I'm always portrayed as "strong", "capable", "positive" and "cheerful". Suddenly my soul seem to have left me and i started freaking out searching for myself.

No amount of talk therapy helped me. Following up was a alot of medications and stabilizers and even a stay in the psychiatric ward. Stabilizers seem to eliminate all kinds of emotions. Even the happy ones. Day in day out i felt like a zombie - completely emotionless. I'm not happy when i'm suppose to be, I cant cry when i really need to. Why did i haf to practically live off these tablets?

I never thought depression could be this real. So real i cant work, cant study, cant move on with life. It jus gets worse when u dont get the understanding from people like ur lecturers and employers. But i'm so glad my family stood by me, my friends supported me, my love was there for me all the same.

Getting back on my feet has been hard. I can jus keep saying i'm glad and still glad.

While lady luck begins smiling at me again, all aspects of my life seems to be improving. My soul is finally awake again. I'm so glad to be going back to school.. so glad i have great employers n clients that were completely understanding.. so ultra glad i'm moving on with my life newly recharged, gained a new perspective n new outlook for life...

I'm turning 22 in a couple of weeks.. I pray its my turning point.. n new life here i come!! :D