What's ur regret?

Turning 24.. I cant help but feel a tad of disappointment in myself. No longer young, and there's simply no time left to fool around anymore. Especially after all that has happened for the past few months. The reality is scaring me. Looking back, I have so many regrets.. Imagine today's the last day for me. Man.. I'll be so pissed off with myself for not trying hard enough all my life!

The priorities of life.

My loved ones are always on the top of my list. The mistake I made was that, I didn't learn to manage the situations well enough. I didn't learn to multitask effectively. Hence I always end up giving up all other aspects of life, jus to focus on one, which actually is not right. Life is about striking a balance.. But I don't regret. Cos aspects like studies and career, I can pursue it anytime. Things like ur family and ur loved ones, once u lose them, u may never get it back..

Everyone's priorities in life is different.

When my partner told me he may need to get a full-time position soon, I knew I had to work out a path for myself. I did not ask him to hang on any longer than he wish, cos for the past few months, it has been really hard on him, and I'm thankful I'm able to leave all operations to him and trust all is safe in his hands.. What more can I ask from a partner like this?

I thought this may not be a bad thing. Maybe we'll jus close the studio down, I'll complete my studies, then get a job and start off again in some marketing/communications position. Getting a regular day job has it's perks too. Stable income, no overheads, no utility bills, there's allowance and benefits.. etc etc..

But is this what I want in my life?

I said, I'll walk away from this start up without regrets if things dont work out. But not when I've not worked hard enough for it. I give myself only this 1 chance.. 1 shot.. If I don't try to make it, I never know if i ever can. There's no right time. There's only now..

Sometimes we gotta take chances at the things that matters to us.

The fact that my mum has made it this far, it occurs to me I still have the chance to make up for the regrets I may have. At the very least, I want to graduate with pride, let her know I have the ability to run a small business and be self sufficient. Her little girl has grown up and she no longer needs to worry abt me.

Sat in office with partner today, and sort out our plans for the near future. Actually things aren't that bad. It's jus that we have quite an amount of money that's floating out there.. Bad debts that we need to chase them back. We also have a couple of strong leads that looks quite promising.. So I just hope that all turns well soon for us, so that we may not have to part ways after all.

I'll hate to have to start all over to find another partner. Not just someone who shares a common goal and vision, but someone u're able to work with through thick and thin.. What I fear the most? Someone immature and dependent, and I literally have to chase after him/her like a crazy and naggy mother goose! (This goes the same for relationships.. Cant express it enough, how glad I am to be single and carefree, and free to pursue my goals and realise my dreams...)

So so.. I really hope things start getting better for me soon, so I can get back to school and work, and hopefully b4 I hit my quarter-life crisis (25 yrs), I'm able to show some results to myself and not just useless like how I turn 24 this year.